My house is a small, 1930’s cottage with a screened-in front porch. It’s a little funky. Half the floor of that screened porch is rotting away. The exterior is covered in wimpy ice-yellow vinyl siding. Some of the doors open into each other, the closets are minuscule, the bedrooms are teensy, the walls with original plaster have lumps and bumps, and each room has been painted a different primary color (ugh!). Soon after B and I bought this house a few months ago, I found myself getting caught up in these imperfections – and it was making me feel stuck, and just very negative about the whole thing. Do you know what I mean? Have any of you bought a house or moved recently and had this experience? When we focus on the negative, it becomes impossible to see the many creative solutions out there…
Clockwise from top left: Domino, Country Living, House Beautiful, Country Living
I came up with decorating ideas, but nothing felt right. It’s like I was trying to make the house into something it was not, and that will never really work. I did not move forward, because our budget is small and I really didn’t want to make any costly mistakes…plus, in the back of my mind is the thought that while we are happy here for now, this is not our forever house. A few years down the road, we will likely sell it – and I would hate to have sunk money into projects that need to be wiped clean to please a wider range of tastes when we put it on the market. I felt stuck. And as someone who loves spending time at home, it’s been a major bummer living in a home that doesn’t look or feel the way I want it to. But recently something changed as I began thinking about this issue in a different way (and I know it may sound a bit strange) – I began listening to my house.
What I mean by “listening” to my house is not really as hippy-dippy as it sounds, but more about imagination and a bit of common sense. I felt stuck because I was fighting the house. This little place will never be a stately Colonial or a spacious modern loft, and I can’t treat it like one. By looking at my home with fresh, realistic eyes, I could easily see that what this house wants to be is a charming little beach cottage. An unfussy, laid-back approach is exactly what this house needs to turn its imperfections from flaws into charm. This house wants to have a little fun. What does your house want to be? Have you tried listening?
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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Laura, we are spending our ENTIRE 4-day Thanksgiving break on Painting Patrol for our new 850 sf 1 BR (+ office!) apartment. While we knew there were things to “clean up” when we bought it (as reflected by the price tag), once it was empty & ours we realized that “clean up” was a big fat understatement. Part of me feels like we’ll never be finished (and, like you, we have a 5 year cap on this place), & it’s so frustrating!
But, after prepping the walls for what seemed like the 10th hour yesterday, I looked at my husband & said, “Y’know, we can tear this place apart & put it back together again & make it into something high-end & spectacular. Or we can do what’s best for us to feel like this is home, & we’re proud & comfortable, & leave the other stuff for the next couple that moves in.” We’re sticking to the latter.
Michelle | When I Grow Up Coach´s last blog ..Gratitude Abounding!
WOW, Michelle, best of luck with the painting this weekend!! (And remember to take some “before” pictures!) We’ll be doing that soon (like next weekend & the weekend after??)…
And I know what you mean about feeling like the work will never be done – that’s the feeling I’ve been trying to get over lately, too. We’ll make some changes, and it won’t be perfect but it will be better than before, and we can make this a home we can feel comfortable in.
Oh man, I know what you mean! Our house is a 1963 ranch style home. The 90 year old lady that lived in it before us was blind and not able to do the upkeep. We bought it two and a half years ago and I am just now getting to the point where I am letting go of my expectations and trying to embrace what feels right for this place. We plan to stay in this house forever but we can’t afford to gut it and start over. We have a modest budget and a lot of time. Things in this house just seem to unfold when it is the right fit. Can’t explain it really but an idea presents itself, it looks and feels right and so we go for it. Hopefully when it is all said and done (will it EVER be??) we will have a place we love and love living in!
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