Remember how we started talking about our Big Dreams in life? I loved reading each and every one of your comments, and I feel so honored that you have been sharing your dreams with me. This is definitely a topic that I’ll want to come back to often, because it’s something so many of us struggle with, and it is very dear to my heart. But today, I want to talk about something a bit different: what do you do when you’ve reached a goal? Whether it’s a major, life-long dream like opening a shop or a smaller step along the way, I’m afraid that many of us just rush right on by without slowing down. We get so caught up in the work and stress and never ending to-do lists that we miss out on the rewards, big time. After all, what’s the point of all of your hard work and effort if you never let yourself enjoy what you have accomplished?
You might think, I’ll be so proud of myself when I finish this program, all my stress will be gone. Or, I’ll be happy when I’m making six figures a year. Or, I know I’ll feel successful when I start my own business. But will you? The truth is, it’s really easy to be down on yourself – even after you have reached a goal! There will always be more goals to reach, more things to do, more stress. We’re trained to keep reaching for more; the hard thing is recognizing the good stuff you have while you’ve got it. But you can decide to take a time out and give yourself a big ol’ pat on the back.
Tip #1: Know it when you’ve got it
Try making a list of all of the mini-goals that make up your Big Goal. Now look at that list, and pick out a good handful that you would be really proud to have accomplished. Put a big fat red star or something next to each one, and make a pact with yourself that you will let yourself feel really good about accomplishing each of your mini-goals. To use myself as an example, my Big Goal is to make a living through my writing. Just on Friday, I accomplished one of my important mini-goals: to get a mention from a blogger I really admire. Instead of freaking myself out (Lolalina is not good enough! I have so much work to do! Etc!), I poured myself an ice cold drink and sat on my front porch for an hour or so, giving myself full permission to feel proud, honored, and happy.
I am reminded of a story a horse trainer told me many years ago, when I was competing in three-day events: after the second day of an event, I was in the #1 position. After cooling down my horse, my trainer took me aside and said, “I want you to go up to the top of that hill over there, by yourself, and bask in this feeling. Let yourself be proud of all you’ve done to get here.” The next day I had some trouble during the final event, show jumping, and I was bumped down to fifth place. But the lesson I learned that weekend has stayed with me ever since – enjoying each step of the path is what it’s all about.
Tip #2: Celebrate your way
Really give some thought to what small things make you happy. Be honest. For instance, for me getting a pedicure would not be a treat (I love the results, but the process doesn’t really make me happy). Here are some ideas to get you thinking:
- Buy a gorgeous bouquet of flowers
- Write about your accomplishment in a journal
- Blog about it ;)
- Buy yourself a piece of that stinky cheese no one else likes
- Browse a great bookstore
- Listen to music you love
- Take a leisurely stroll in a park or nature area
And hm, actually you might want to think back to what your goals were a few years ago. Have you already taken any steps towards your goal? Don’t let those small achievements slip by unnoticed!
Tip #3: Shout it from the rooftops!
I think there is something very human about wanting to spread the news. I don’t know about you, but I know that I don’t feel completely satisfied when something good has happened until I tell somebody. So go ahead, call your family. Call your best friend. Just be sure you are telling someone who will be supportive – this is about celebrating, and you don’t want anyone raining on your parade! If you would like to, I want to invite you to share some of your latest accomplishments right here in the comments section. Go ahead, toot your own horn! You deserve to be recognized and appreciated for wherever you are on the path to your goals.
{images: Laura Gaskill}
As some of you may know, my husband and I are looking to purchase our first home. Well, on Sunday we went to see a house. A soft spring breeze floated in by way of a charming screened-in porch. Light streamed through the windows, and though tiny, the bungalow had a spacious, open feel. And in the backyard were lilacs. Three huge, blooming lilacs. And lily of the valley. We’re going to the bank today… wish us luck!
I'm throwing out 50 things - join me!
